My actual hand-writing
Few days ago I was bitching about not getting selected for EVS projects, but often I think why would they ?

Well, besides deserving one and having all the right qualities I am whinny and victimizing myself all the time.

I am picky and I have a lot of unresolved issues.

I don't know who I am and that scares the crap out of me.

I have no one to believe in me, to invest in me besides a few good words that don't mean anything, sometimes a slap on my face.

I don' wanna die, don't wanna live either. Too coward to die, to scared to live. I'm scared I'm too screwed up to have have the chance to live someday again.

If someone has an island and wants to send me there for good I'd be happy to pack my things tonight, and introduces the same numbers (4 8 15 16 23 42 a.k.a. Lost) every few hours, wanna send me on the moon ? Fine by me.

European Voluntary Service - Is it for everyone ?

European Voluntary Service - Is it for everyone ? Here is a question I've been asking myself for quite  a while now. In this article I'll give a try to answer this question.

According to Youth in Action Programme Guide "Youth in Action is the Programme the European Union has set up for young people. It aims to inspire a sense of active European citizenship, solidarity and tolerance among young Europeans and to involve them in shaping the Union's future. It promotes mobility within and beyond the EU's borders, non-formal learning and intercultural dialogue, and encourages the employability and inclusion of all young people, regardless of their educational, social and cultural background: Youth in Action is a Programme for all!

Every year, thousands of projects are submitted by promoters in order to get financial support from the Programme; a selection process aims at granting the best projects."

Well, in theory it sound nice, but let's take a look on what European Voluntary Service (EVS) is particularly about.

I'm everything I am Because you loved me

Someday I will want to say these words, hope there will be someone to say these words to ...

For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I'll be forever thankful baby
You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through through it all

I don't know what am I doing wrong ....

For quite a while now I've been trying to apply for an EVS (European Voluntary Service) and to be exact two years have past and all I can be proud of is that I made it to the finalists a dozen times, I had many interviews (written or by phone), sent a lot of Motivation letters and CVs but not once, no one told me what I have been doing wrong because I did not get selected for a project.

It's frustrating writing and re-editing millions of times your motivation letter, adjusting it to every project in part, expressing your motivation for a lot of projects, fall in love with them, dreaming with your eyes open, planning activities, reading dozen of times the guidelines, the Youth in Action programme, imagining yourself participating at meetings, making yourself useful.

I think I did a pretty damn good job writing my Motivation letter and as underestimating myself I think I deserve an EVS project where I could grow, where I could change lives, where I could give someone a life meaning. In my previous article I was saying how I felt discriminated because of the history my country is carrying, a post-soviet union country, where democracy and human rights are not fully known.

Although I have double citizenship it seams crazy mentioning in your motivation letter or your CV, I was born in Moldova, but I got Romanian citizenship too, as my grandparents before Second World War had Romanian citizenship too. Many people wish to have an European citizenship in order to travel, get relocated, get a job, I, on the other side, have it and still feel stuck.

I've been in a selection committee before, I know what it takes to select participants for one project or another, but every time, almost every time, I've been trying to give feedback, to help participants improve their actions, improve their applications and apply again. I always try to give feedback , either it's a project or a everyday life situation.

If I had the chance ...

... I would get my passports and travel, try new voyage packages for travel agencies, spend hours in the airport as well as in the air, meet new people, try new cultures

... I would become an air pilot, fly people safely to their destinations

... I'd become a television actor, teach people valuable lessons through the art of the small screen

... Be a trainer, somewhere abroad, a trainer in youth policies, volunteering and other domains

... I'd like to learn a new language, probably Spanish

... Buy a house in London

... found a Charity organization to militate for a satisfying living standard for poor people in Africa

... I'd like to be a part of a music band, as a back-vocalist or maybe being a part of choir

Trust (2010 film)

Istoria unei fete obisnuite din Statele Unite, cu parinti obisnuiti, familie obisnuita in care domina increderea si intelegerea.


Cind sufletul mi-e in zbucium ma afund in muzica care si in cele mai grele momente in aduc multe rivnitele momente de liniste sufleteasca ...

Cu jumatatea mea de octava (la singular) incerc sa fredonez melodia ... si incerc sa sper, desi esuez, ca intr-o buna zi voi privi in urma si voi realiza ca ceea prin ce am trecut e doar o mica parte din viata mea si care e de domeniul trecutului ...

Cineva spunea ca e loc sub soare pentru toti, desi de 22 de ani incoace nu mi-l pot gasi ....

Ben E. King Amor

Great song, clasica anilor '60, 1961 ca sa fiu exact !

Kobuleti, here I come!

I guess, dupa mai mult de jumatate de an, din nou, am posibilitatea de a parasi hotarele tarii, si totul datorita Danielei Alexeiciuc :)

Am posibilitatea sau mai bine zis oportunitatea de a participa la training-ul "A EUROPE OF CITIZENS – A VISION FOR A NEAR FUTURE" care va avea loc in orasul Kobuleti, oras pe malul Marii Negre, Georgia intre 8 si 15 septembrie.

A trecut ceva vreme de la ultima oportunitate de a participa la un proiect organizat ca la carte si finantat de societatea Slovaco-Georgiana, therefore, orice training organizat bine are tendinta de a deveni traditie, ca si cursul de liderism organizat de tinerii din or Singerei de altfel.

Stuck in the clouds

Apparently, for a few years now, I am stuck in the clouds, I try (or maybe I don't) to let go of my dreams but I fail miserably each time.

I am the one to blame (or at least half the blame it's mine) my dreams don't come true, and probably most of them never will  and that's what is killing me the most, it's eating away.

I guess my depression inspires me to write this kind of articles, sad music, sad rhythms bring me peace and say "it's ok, ... it's ok".

This world it's not mine, not even a piece of it, it doesn't belong to me as well as I don't belong to it. And yet I am stuck in it, I wanna leave but the world won't let me go ...

It's like I am the main character in a sad movie that never ends ...